Thursday, October 30, 2008

so-called-friends

I have this friend. We are close. We get along, but I think it's mostly because I can 'deal' with her crap and understand that I shouldn't take what she says personally.

She is one of those ppl who grew up getting teased by kids in school. She has no problem talking about that fact to everyone. You can tell she is still insecure about herself by the way she talks.

She ALWAYS talks about herself. Never bad. Always positive. Bragging --
If someone tries to have a two-way convo with her, she finds a way to change it to a one-way convo all about herself. She needs to know people are hearing her brag about herself, so she talks loud and overpowers anyone who tries to interupt.

She got married 3 years ago -- and to this day, continues to compare her wedding to every one she goes to. 3 months after she got married, her bestfriend got married. Mr MooMoo and I were invited too. We sat together with her and her new hubby and some of her friends relatives. Throughout the wedding she would continuosly compare ... "Well at MY wedding, we had a DJ instead of a band, and I liked that better.", "At MY wedding, we had less people to make it more intimate, this is just too much here." etc. etc... it was horrible. I mean, you could just tell these people thought there was something wrong with her about how she talked about herself and down about her friend. No one at our table that entire night, tried to start a conversation with her... They knew where it would lead... alas -- they didn't have to try --- she spoke non-stop about herself anyway.

Recently -- I found out from guests at my wedding, that she did the same thing to me. Comparisons about her wedding and how it was better than mine. How RUDE... lucky for me, I sat her at a table of guests that were all invited to her wedding too. One lady told me : "I don't know what she was talking about, I was at her wedding, and it was the bore-of-the-century and it was three years ago!"... It was nice to hear that.

She is 3 years older than me -- only 3. She has referred to me as her daughter and insisted that I call her mommy on occasion. Since she has been married (to my coworker none-the-less), she has referred to him as my daddy. When she got pregnant, she bought me a card that said something to the likes of : Congratulations, you're getting a new baby brother.

She has always felt she had the answers to everything.

She knows what makes a relationship work, and has always said negative things about my and mr. moomoo's relationship. And how it won't work etc... b/c it's not like hers.

You see.. she married him for money -- she wasn't even attracted to him when she found out he was interested in her, until she found out how 'stable' he was. We had a joint blog with me, her and another girlfriend of ours and she wrote all that stuff in it!! She cannot deny it... and I'm not exaggerating. LOL Eventually, it seems... she fell in love with him.

What I'm getting at, is that one of the reasons I have this separate blog is because of her.
She has asked me when I plan on getting pregnant, and I have told her "I'm not sure, b/c we want to go to Hawaii.". I'm as vague as I can be. I know what she is getting at.

She wants to know exactly when, so she can compare our TTC experiences.

She had confided in me as a close friend in October 2006 when they started TTCing. They had no success after 5 months... they saw doctors b/c they were both in their 30's and were worried it was their ages... it wasn't...b/c in March, they conceived.

She told me that I really need to PLAN my pregnancy, unlike them, b/c they didnt need to plan, since they got pregnant ON THE FIRST TRY!!!! I said to her ... "But you tried in October, and got pregnant in March."... and she replied -- "I never said that."

Oh boy -- so this is one of those 'friends' who I probably shouldn't have a buddy buddy pregnancy with... Someone who would compare her kid to mine... brag not wanting to hear any positives about anyone elses kid... eck I can't stand people like that.

It's people like her, who make me NOT want to brag about things. When we got back from our honeymoon everyone wanted to know about it. What was there to say besides it was gorgeous and relaxing... People don't really want to hear the details, do they?! Maybe some do, but I try my best not to go on for very long, b/c I know how I feel when my 'friend' talks to me about stuff, so I try my best not to be perceived the same way.

Don't get me wrong, she is a good friend. She has always been there for me in bad times and good times. She has saved me in certain conflict situations. She and I have opposite personalities -- sort of. She's very OUTSPOKEN, and I tend to avoid conflict...so when I need something to happen, she has no problem making sure it happens. I love that.

But -- I can see the insecurity in her everyday -- all the time. I know why she is the way she is, but I don't have the heart to tell her to get over herself -- If she is bothering me and I try to ignore her... she doesn't notice... so that's what I do -- I go into my own little peaceful world while she gloats.

If you see a post with Gloaty in it -- now you'll know, I'm referring to her. lol


TTC

TTC -- I just learned this means Trying To Conceive...

I would definitely prefer, "We are TTC-ing" -- rather than -- "We are having lots of sex".
Sounds a little bit classier.

So -- Mr MooMoo and ideally would like to have a baby next year (2009 d'oh).
The ideal situation would involve us getting pregnant between Jan 1 - May 1.
If we didn't get pregnant by May 1, then we would stop for a short time.

We are planning on going on vacation to Hawaii which would include a 11+ hour plane flight (if direct). Since I have Fibromyalgia, I have been warned that 1st Trimester symptoms are a lot worse than those without. So, IF I happened to have all that morning-sickness stuff, flying 11 hours isn't going to be fun. Nor is being in Hawaii puking everyday. We'd like to be in the 2nd-very early 3rd, trimester when flying. I'm too worried to fly late in 3rd trimester, b/c what if I can't fit in a seatbelt LOL!!!

We would start TTC-ing late July (during vacation) again.

It's strange to plan around a vacation -- but it's a family reunion that can't be missed!

My fear is not being able to get pregnant. I don't know if I can or can't, and we won't know until we try. I have a horrible diet since I have become a vegetarian -- and I crave chicken like you wouldn't believe. I want it. Gotta have it -- and I am going to try and reintroduce free-range chicken into my life before Thanksgiving... We'll see how it goes.

I meet with my Gyno on 11/11 -- (such an unlucky number combo for me) -- to discuss everything.

In a way -- I would love to just get pregnant now even though we are not trying -- just to KNOW that I CAN get pregnant... eck.

But, since the honeymoon -- we've had sex 0 times. GO US!!!

See what happens when you aren't bored!!!

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Monday, October 27, 2008

The start of something new

Ah, another new beginning in life.

Change.

It's what I like...

It keeps me going, prevents me from being bored, makes me feel productive...

Change.

I started this blog b/c I wanted a place to be 'alone'... as in some previous attempts I've had such as the veggiedoll site -- that is now gone. I've moved on. I got married, and hence, Mrs. MooMoo.

Really, there's no explanation... just try and stay with me if you can ... those few of you who I told about this place are ppl who I trust. I haven't told everyone about this spot, b/c really, it's not for prying eyes. And those who just 'happen' upon the blog -- well welcome damnit, really -- welcome.

Here is where I get to vent about married life, selling a house, buying a new house, searching for another dog pal for my pup, so-called-friends, work (as vaguely as I can), family and starting a new family of our own...

I don't want my 'rents or inlaws to read about our bed habits and the like -- so it's going here.

Another place to vent -- Joy